I think I have a dog who is secretly a human.
Like Scabbers/Peter Pettigrew or the Shaggy Dog/Human Guy
Or at the very least and less creepy, just highly enlightened a la Dino or Astro.
The list is long and distinguished but foremost at the moment is his ability to outwit my sleeping in attempts.
I've been clipping his nails more to avoid the early morning clacking on the hardwood.
How does he respond?
Some how he has devised a way to sit down in the loudest fashion possible.
It's like he is doing some kind of elaborate wrestling move where he slams his haunches on the floor, stands up and repeats.
It surpasses all attempts at effective description. Imagine if you were to angrily throw yourself into an easy chair in a huff.
Now imagine that instead of a cushiony ass you have bony tendons and a tail that somehow makes a crunchy noise, and instead of a soft cozy chair you are huffing into an unforgiving, hard wood floor that radiates sound better than most acoustic halls.
Why can't I be smarter than him?
Why?
He is human, and kinda emo. Like how he secretly wants to be held, but instead he lurks around until you drag him into an embrace and then he tries to pretend that he's snuggling "ironically."
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