Do you have a plan? I don't even have a Pla!

Today I decided I needed some goals.
Please note they are not New Year's Resolutions.
Those are a waste of time for people who are unhappy with their lives and have the misguided approach of only doing something about it because of an arbitrary date on a calendar.
That's right, I am a New Year's Grinch.

Okay, back to me and my goals.
I figure to distinguish myself from all those schmucks who make goals and forget about them... I need to create a few awesome goals that might happen eventually interspersed with completely achievable (or already achieved) tasks that will make me feel good and remind me of how awesome I am for doing them.

Today I will start with 5 goals:

1) Lose some weight. I want to look saucy when I am in Vegas in March.
 - I have a Lean Cuisine meal for lunch today so I am well on my way, right?
2) Grow my hair out.
 - I do not have a hair cut scheduled for today or tomorrow. Yay me. Look how good I am at    accomplishing things!
3) Make a Tiramisu
 - This will take a while, and I have social plans this weekend so it will have to wait.
4) Take more pictures to document awesome-ness.
 - Okay, this will actually be tough. I am perfectly capable of this but for some reason the act itself eludes me. I have a camera permanently stationed in my purse... what possible excuse do I have to not do this? Apparently I dont need one. I just don't do it/never remember. This will change. Sub-goal will be to document at least three items this weekend.
5) Keep quitting smoking.
 - Yes, you are awesome! Way to go on re-accomplishing this goal each minute of every day. Yes I quit like 2 years ago, but cram it. I rule at continually quitting. Whoo!


So, of these initial 5 goals, all are relatively achieveable on the surface but if you subscribe to circular logic the way i do, you will notice there are some serious sneak concerns that I have to be on red alert to avoid:

For instance, Losing Weight is in direct contrast to making and inevitably devouring a delicious homemade tiramisu. But conversely, working out more increases how fast your hair grows so how genius am I to kill two fat birds with one hairy stone?
And, following the rule of awesome-ness, once I am hot and saucy again, I will want to be the star of my own sitcom so taking pictures more often should be a breeze.
Unfortunately sexy people are always seen smoking which only adds to their appeal so I might have to revisit that, but we will tackle that bridge when we come to it right?